LETTING GO INTO THE RHYTHM OF LIFE
This post follows “settling into the groove” and it indicates a next step, letting go and moving on. Settling in relates to 
the “Samatha” level of our meditation training. Samatha means peace, or cultivating peace in its active rendering. In Tibetan Buddism it is taught as a 9 stage process of progressive settling. These Tantric systems of Indian and Tibetan Buddhism endeavor to connect mind and body. Progressive settling in to the present is not just “being in the now” in a conceptal sense. But settling into ourselves as the working basis of our path toward full awakening. Yet “path” implies movement. All things, even when apparently still, are in motion. All things are in dynamic interaction with all else. Settling into that movement with unhurried elegance is “entering the stream”.
But once we have settled into the stream, what next?
The next stage is to let go into the flow. Settling in requires a progressive release of somatic tension that allows us to settle. If we are trying to find our flow in an external way, we are missing the working basis. We have to release ourselves from the gripping tension that disallows relaxation. Once we have let go of the gripping that keeps us separated from the flow of life, we are no longer living in the forced fantasy of our ego mind. We discover the sad and liberating truth that the universe is not all about us. If we let go of me, we can reconnect to the essential movement of life around us. When we are stuck in the frozen mind of ME we are cut off from life around us. But when we settle in past ME, we enter the stream and connect to everything else. Then we can progressively train ourselves to let go and trust the process. This is not easy, and we will constantly have missteps when we seize up, or become distracted. But our Samatha training reminds us when we are lost, simply come back. Let go into the flow, and when we block ourselves, let go of that.
Simply said, the meditative flow state is letting go into the movement of life. Our work is to acknowledge the ways we block our flow and learn to release ourselves.
It is as though we are heading down a crystal river of conscious awareness. And thoughts, feelings, emotions come along with us. We can relate to them as we would clouds in the sky or objects in forests passing by on the shore. The meditative flow state is not an exclusion of life around us but a connection to it. Our work is to remain in the rhythm of flow. We can acknowledge thoughts, but simply let them go by as they are not in the present flow. However, when one thought grabs us and demands outsized attention, it’s as though we’re staring into the woods. We will flow wherever our mind points. So, when we are fixated on anything out of the stream it’s as if we become are stuck in the weeds along the shore. This is natural and even helpful sometimes, but it is important to remember the steam of life is flowing behind us. As we are reimagining the past, our body is aging nonetheless. As we project the future and our life is continuing on without us. So, our work is to push off from the shore and return to the flow.
Awareness of our breathing is the perfect tool for maintaining the meditative flow state. Breathing is the intimate rhythm of our life. It describes a through line of our life from moments after birth to our last moments. Returning to the breath is a way of maintaining our meditative awareness on the cushion, but this process can be effectively carried over into our daily life. We can use awareness of our breathing to relax the nervous system and allow the mind to let go back into a natural flow. Breathing can guide us through turbulent waters. When in doubt, breathe your way through. Allow yourself to settle and then let go. Letting go INTO the flow is not running away from anything. It’s allowing yourself to move past it with minimal engagement. How many issues in life simply do not need the attention we give them. I worked with a shaman who told me my work was not to be anything or to accumulate things, but to learn from everything. Appreciation means not grabbing, but seeing clearly the value of something. We lose perspective when we grab things. We objectify them and interrupt the flow. When we appreciate someone, we have the distance to see them as they are. And if our desire or anger or need causes us to get stuck we have the tools of recognition and return. We see that we are stuck. We feel our stomach tightening, our mind scripting imaginary narratives, our heart aching for something that isn’t here. Then we know we are stuck in the past or the future. The present is a flow state. So when we are stuck, we recognize that and return to the flow of our breath. The breath will guide us back to the flow of now.
Another technique for finding the meditative flow of consciousness used by Indian and Tibetan Buddhists, on practitioners and other non-dual schools is the practice of mantra. I was doing a solitary mantra retreat trying to learn the practice. As the mantra was in Sanskrit, it took time to learn, time to speak and more time to recite with the fluidity needed to connect me to the flow. I was unable to get that last part. No matter how I tried, I couldn’t break the wall of my controlling mind and simply let go into it. I was speaking as if praying, but the power of mantra was not in my mind speaking to the lineage of Buddhas. It was in letting go into the mind of the Buddhas. For the life of me, I couldn’t get it. I locked myself into solitary, but that only created a hall of mirrors that birthed a cacophony of thoughts, ideas, perceptions that were all blocking the flow. I had a spiritual writer’s block. Finally, I took a session off and went out for a long walk though the woods. It was early spring but there was snow on the ground. I prayed that someone someplace could help me escape the tyranny of my need to know everything. I sat by a swiftly moving stream in exhaustion. I let the stream flow through me. And then the mantra came.
I found its flow. And worked to not grab onto that. For a few days I would return to the stream and listen. I had to learn that I couldn’t do it. Like the stream, it was already happening. All I had to do was get out of the way and connect.
The IChing says that in times of difficulty become water. Sink to a deep point, build up your strength, and flow around or over the obstacle. In time, the river will cut through mountains.
With meditation practice we are training to notice subtler and more ordinary moments that stop the mind. And perhaps more importantly, we learn to accept these authentic moments, as they are, without commentary for longer periods of time. This serves to infiltrate the wall of separation that we fabricate to keep ourselves isolated from life. You might say, we are turning the lights on to our life. If our mind is supple enough, we can see all life as alive and interactive. In time, we see ourselves as a part of everything rather than struggling to overcome anything. In popular culture, this is known as being one with everything. In Meditation traditions this is known as non-dual experience. Nondual experiences are instances of clear perception when we are directly connected to the moment as opposed to dualistic experiences when we are separated out and looking in.
In conventional life, we assume we should push harder. And when that doesn’t work, we assign blame, usually to ourselves. I’m lazy. I’m useless. What’s wrong with me? We might take on the role of a frustrated parent yelling outside the door, “GET UP!” or a sports coach urging,. “Get past this and move it, you baby.” But if we actually were a baby, no one would speak to us that way. In fact, we might find it cute when a toddler in their terrible twos holds their breath. And while some foxhole instances require tough love or aggression to provide the motivation we lack in most cases this is an overplayed lazy option. It is not a recommended approach to guiding a child toward self-sufficiency, nor developing a meditation practice that includes our full being. You see, we so-called adults have grown beyond the children we once were, but the children have nonetheless remained. We can take the approach of ignoring our child, as many of our parents did. And as we grew, some of us learned to ignore the pleading of what the Indigo Girls referred to as our “Kid Fears”. Unfortunately, this approach met with enough success that “grin and bear it” became the order of the day and some pushed through until the seed of doubt grew into a boulder we could not lift.
Developing a strong meditation practice is one of the cases for which kindness is an essential method. Some of us learn this in meditation and the approach begins to bleed into other aspects of our life. In my opinion, this is the most important result of a consistent and authentic meditation practice. But, as wonderful as this sounds, some days we just can’t make that long journey from bed to the cushion. Yet, pushing ourselves in the way we do everything else, sets us off on the wrong tact. We are at the mercy of ego or self-will. It is the wrong view, because we are somehow believing there is something we can get from the meditation that requires struggle. The adage “nothing good comes without struggle” is not apt in developing an authentic practice free of aggression. So, when experience resistance to our practice it makes a certain sense. We are deconstructing the fortress of ego. We feel exposed and fearful. Sometimes we may need to halt the process and allow the fear to catch up with us. And kindness and patience are the remedies. When we have the patience to meet resistance with kindness in meditation practice, we have an opportunity to see its effectiveness. As we develop faith in love as a remedy we become kinder and more patient with ourselves. As we become kinder and more patient with ourselves, we naturally become more caring of others.
and is ready to step forward. In this way, we our full mind can develop natural assertion and confidence just like a child learning to walk back to their room. Just like flowers blooming in spring. The seed has no idea of the flower it will become as it is too busy pushing up through the darkness. This is not easy, but the plant does this without struggle. It rises because it is its nature. No one needs to stand above it yelling for it to grow. Along the way, if the ground freezes, the growing stops until the stalk gathers the energy to move again. We can see progress in nature that, while not without challenge, is in synchronicity with nature. The ancient book of wisdom, referred to as the IChing, states that obstacles can be overcome by emulating water. Warrior has the patience to pause until their strength rebuilds and allows them to flow over or around the obstacle. The river never feels insecure or berates itself for this.
In meditation theory, the sun is used as a depiction of awareness. The sun shines on everything equally regardless of whether it is blocked by the moon, the clouds or the turning earth. Awareness is alive and awake in the universe whether or not we are conscious of it. It is the work of the meditator to uncover the veils of self-imposed obscuration that block access to awareness. We notice thoughts that are actually quite small in the scheme, and bring our attention back to the space afforded by the breath. As we do this, we are stepping back from the thought and revealing a larger context. Our blockage might appear less significant, even humorous. Over time, these obscurations become less solid and less imbued with “meaning”. They become right-sized. Sometimes they disappear altogether. Although the significant obscurations require less force, but more patience. Some will likely return. When that happens we are faced with the same task. Notice them as thinking, and return to the breath. This reconnects us to space, which is perspective. It sucks that we often have to be fooled again and again but that is the work of creating access to awareness. That sunlight will, in time, permeate our experience, but there is a lot of slogging to get there.
After years of study, training and ascetic discipline, the Buddha began a 49-day yogic meditation fast. During this time, he gained mastery over his body and attained relative mental clarity. But, as he was at the point of death, he did not have the strength to fully cross over into awakenment. Perhaps knowing that his work was not about his own accomplishment, but that his quest would be to reach a state that would allow him to help others, he broke his vow and accepted a bowl of rice from a young woman. It wasn’t until he accepted this sustenance that he had the strength to attain full realization.
Therefore, as the Buddha’s teachings developed, the methods changed. Zen Buddhism is different from Vajrayana Buddhism, which is different from Theravada. Buddhism in the west is its own expression. The commonality to all of these expressions is that they are rooted in the belief that we are born as we should be and our lives can be led by a path positioned toward greater awareness of ourselves and our world. Each expression of Buddhism has its own methods. It is considered a rookie mistake to be an unwavering adherent to any method. Renunciation is not abstinence. Renunciation stepping back from an attachment in order to see more clearly. Sometimes this happens all at once, and sometimes incrementally. Renunciation may require abstinence in some cases. or for some period for those who cannot work safely with the person, place, or thing. There is no shame in that. But abstinence is not the point. The point is liberation. And liberation is not another jail we place ourselves in. Liberation is the vast space beyond our imprisonment that we can grow into.